I Survived Their Laws. Thanks To The Supreme Court, I Won’t Be The Last.

An unfortunate setback for the trans community.

This morning, in a 6-3 decision, the Supreme Court voted to uphold Tennessee’s law banning gender-affirming care for minors. While I'm usually able to remain optimistic through all the attacks the trans community is facing, I now find myself writing this story with tears in my eyes. Laws like the one that stole 2 years, 3 months, and 4 days of my life will continue to harm trans youth for the foreseeable future. Laws like the one I survived.

Life Under These Laws

When I was 2, my family moved to Texas. Growing up, I was very interested in politics, and although I’d spend hours reading about political issues, those issues never really affected me on a personal level. However, as I started coming to terms with my identity at 15 years old, the political landscape started to get much more real. A few months before, Texas AG Ken Paxton had issued a de facto ban on gender-affirming care in the form of a threat to investigate parents who allow their kids to access life-saving medical care for child abuse.

I thought the less my parents knew of my identity, the better, and I didn’t tell them for a year. I couldn’t risk tearing my family apart. By the time I did come out, the Texas Legislature had already passed SB 14, which codified the ban into law. And although I asked, my parents weren’t supportive enough to help me seek care out-of-state.

So I waited. I battled depression every single day, longing for the life I wished to live. I felt trapped, powerless to stop the entirely avoidable pain that consumed my existence. But through all this, I tried my hardest to survive. I knew that on my 18th birthday, tomorrow would finally come.

When I walked into Planned Parenthood on October 21st, 2024 (3 days after my birthday), the doctor took one look at my date of birth and asked, “You’ve waited a long time for this, haven’t you?” All I could do was nod. It hadn’t hit me at the time, but my nightmare was over. The next day, I picked up my HRT (hormone replacement therapy) from the pharmacy and took my first dose in the car.

I woke up the following morning feeling different. The brain fog I had known my whole life was gone, replaced by a calm I never imagined being able to experience. For the first time, I got out of bed for the sake of getting up and just walked around my house. It was then that I understood what I had missed out on. It was then that I realised what had been taken from me.

In the 8 months since starting HRT, my life has improved more than I thought possible: I no longer hate my body, my parents have become much more supportive, my personal relationships have improved, and I got into a great school in Illinois. I’m finally living the way I always wanted. And while I feel thankful every day that I survived, not everyone is as lucky.

The Real Cost of Skrmetti

Gender-affirming care is medically necessary for a reason: research by the Trevor Project has shown that laws like the one upheld today cause up to a 72% increase in suicidality rates. That number is just way too high. Proponents of these laws like to argue that those that come to regret transitioning will be stopped from being harmed. But all that does is show that those who support gender-affirming care bans place more value on the suffering of the small number of detransitioners than they do on the lives of the countless trans kids they’re killing.

It’s an argument made in bad faith, one that doesn’t make sense outside the bubble of hypocrisy they’ve put themselves in. And then, when guns are the leading cause of death in school-aged children, they do nothing. I like to say they’d ban schools to prevent students from being targeted before they ban guns, and although that sounds ridiculous, that’s essentially what they’re doing with gender-affirming care.

There’s no telling how long it is until they pass the first total ban against gender-affirming care. And with the decision today, I’m not optimistic it will be struck down. The ‘good’ news is these bans will be limited to states controlled by Republicans. Additionally, a nationwide ban is extraordinarily unlikely, so HRT access for all ages will be preserved in the blue half of the country. The bottom line is, the US will essentially become an apartheid state for trans people, one where the state you’re born in will have an outsized and entirely preventable impact on your life expectancy and overall quality of life.

Although this isn’t the news we all want to hear, it’s important to remember that you aren’t alone. I know the world sucks right now, but things will get better. There’s always a light at the end of the tunnel. Always. And yes, sometimes that tunnel is really, really dark and long, but it ends. Tomorrow will come for our community. Our hope is something they can never take away.